El Día de los Muertos: contacting deceased loved ones through mediumship
As a young child, Becky Hesseltine felt “eyes in the room” or a presence she didn’t understand. Sometimes she was scared.
It was only when she said yes to understanding the phenomenon, and not being afraid of it, that her psychic and mediumistic abilities blossomed.
“I hadn’t realized that connecting with other people’s souls and deceased souls is a natural connection and expression within our soul,” Hesseltine said. “It’s very soothing and loving.”
In 2017, the Eagle resident quit her job at the company to help people connect with their deceased loved ones and bring clarity to their own lives.
She begins the readings by telling customers to drop all expectations, likening the readings to inviting friends to a coffee shop: they may or may not come, and if they do, they will have their own agenda to share,” just like our friends in the physical world,” she said.
“Imagine not having a physical body but still feeling, still having a spirit, and connecting with your loved ones,” she said. “We are spirits having a human experience. We are connected to our soul family – a deep bond with each other. When we allow ourselves to be touched by this connection, we can communicate. I believe it is the most natural language, the language of the heart and the soul. I believe anyone can do it. It’s a matter of availability. It’s not so much capacity. It’s availability. … It’s basically a shift in your consciousness.
Some people seem to be more inclined to feel the unseen world, and that can be scary without the paradigm in which mediums like Hesseltine frame it. She and others like Cheryl Murphy, who teaches summer sessions on intuition at Carbondale, say only love is real. Therefore, the idea of haunted houses and malevolent ghosts is simply an inaccurate perception.
Just as you can walk into a room and feel your friend is upset, you can also walk into an old hotel or house and find a lingering memory or energy pattern.
“Your friend leaves an energetic imprint in this space that you can feel,” Hesseltine said. “We leave energy behind us.”
She doesn’t believe that ghosts haunt people or that spirits get “stuck” here on Earth.
“(As a spirit) you probably wouldn’t hang around this house. You probably had better things to do,” she said. “I believe the moment the body physically passes, you are automatically in the spirit world – you are automatically in this place that feels like home…and you are free.”
She thinks we often make sense of these energy patterns through a filter of fear, conditioned by society’s horror and ghost stories. Murphy has a similar belief, which includes spirits perhaps wanting our attention to convey a message (and, of course, that could include twinkling lights or sightings), but they’re not meant to scare or haunt us. .
“Lovely ones just want to say hello and tell you they’re fine and care about you, so beware of your filter,” Hesseltine said, adding that it’s a mysterious world with so much more to explore. . “The relationship between you and your beloved continues.”
This seemed to be the case during my own reading with Hesseltine.
Without my saying a word, “a man in the spirit world with a fatherly quality” who had been in the military “in charge of others” passed by. Indeed, my father’s father was an officer during the Second World War. He expressed his sadness that he couldn’t be there the way he wanted for his own kids and wanted my dad and I to know that he was sorry for pushing my dad so hard which had a ripple effect in my life. He wanted us to know that we are worthy beyond our accomplishments, and He helps us to soften our own hearts even more and let in greater love. He said my “glow” brought out the “mushy” side of himself, which he couldn’t allow with his own children. And that’s right: I met a loving and kind grandfather who supported me as a competitive figure skater and beyond; his children grew up with a much more difficult version.
During the reading, my grandfather mentioned a photo of him, with me, skating. I told Hesseltine that I didn’t think anything like that existed, but an intention I had for a photo immediately came to mind: for several years I had wanted to imitate a photo that appeared in 1988 in the Record-Courier in Kent, Ohio, from my grandparents who roller-skated in their old age. I wanted to capture that same pose with my husband on ice skates. During the reading, my grandfather encouraged this idea. But it wasn’t until last Thursday, about a week after reading it, as my husband and I were heading to the rink, that I realized I had to try and capture this photo now to better illustrate this story. So, without a professional photographer or much preparation, we did our best.
While the reading also included information about me, my childhood and where I might go, my grandmother (on my father’s side, also pictured) proved her presence by talking about at least three pieces of jewelry she gave to me (and I have three rings from her that I absolutely treasure). Along with conveying her love and support, she encouraged me to use my voice, something she said she hadn’t been able to express as much as she would have liked (in other words , write this fucking book and teach more).
“When you don’t feel supported in the physical world, you have them with you, just loving you in life,” Hesseltine said.
While I have certainly felt their presence – and that of their son Michael – over the years since their passing, reading makes this Day of the Dead all the more poignant and powerful for me as I feel their presence and glide to through the mystery of life with just a little more ease.